Oh, yes, the blog.
There was no time for ablogging during the winter vacation. But now open your browser as wide as it will go, for I bring you three observations of Good Things in our newborn year of 2003:
1) All of a sudden al Qaeda is taking credit for their attacks [Bali, Kenya], whereas before they would infuriatingly refuse to admit that attacks were anything more than lone gunmen-types inspired by Allah. It gave creepmeister Osama an other-wordly disinterested quality that, in my opinion, doubled his creepiness. It's nice to once again have enemies who, like (most) Bond villains, take credit for their heinous crimes.
2) Everyone talks about porn a lot these days. Case in point: During the whole Lott controversy, Fareed Zakaria, the editor of Newsweek International and all-around freakishly intelligent guy (what's that on my nose?) was on ABC's This Week. According to ABC.com,
Zakaria said the Republican Party's efforts to distance itself from Lott's comments ring hollow. Noting President Bush's visit to the ultra-conservative Bob Jones University during the 2000 campaign, Zakaria said the party has shown a history of insensitivity on issues of race.
"I think this is sort of like a mainstream movie star who has suddenly realized that he suddenly needs to disavow his past when he used to make porn flicks," said Zakaria.
I credit Zakaria for having the instinct to know when it would first be okay to use the word ‘porn’ on Sunday morning political shows. (Still some rank smell coming from my nose)
But more importantly, I envy today’s tweens and teens for the familiarity they must have with the idea of pornography, as well as the healthy attitudes today’s TV/films teach them about masturbation sex, everything. Growing up in the Reagan years, the extent of the information we got about sexuality was the cheerleaders in ‘Revenge of the Nerds’ asking boys if they wanted to ‘do it’ ('it' was never, ever explained) and the guys in Porky’s making jokes about how small Pee-Wee's penis was. That one unchangeable characteristic would always dictate the kind of person Pee-Wee would be (sniveling bastard), leaving every American 13-year old petrified that his hoo hoo dilly might stop growing any day now. 'American Pie' is those films' superior in every way. You lucky little bastards.
3) And best: the end of the Kenyan presidency of Daniel Arap Moi. Biographer Andrew Morton described Moi's clan--the Tugen--as a people known for running endurance, cattle thievery, and passivity in the face of challenges. Moi's 24-year reign--which ended Saturday--was pure Tugen: patient and calculating when dispatching his rivals, effectively indifferent to corruption, and uninterested in tackling reform. Good riddance. The people elected to replace were undoubtedly the best choice for the country.
out.
