I'm standing on the scale pretty much nude in the doctor's office, so yes, I'm feeling a bit vulnerable while everyone else is hanging around in the jackets they left home in. My grandfather is trying explain the wonder of YourBabyCanRead.com to mom. Mom has already heard about YourBabyCanRead.com because dad gets up as early as grandpa (and falls asleep on the couch at night like grandpa) and every morning he shakes me over mom's head and says 'I saw something on TV that said my baby can read!' She knows that there is 30-day guaruntee but she's still OW. OW.
Everything after that is a mix of pain and snot. I never knew I had so much mucus: Apparently the body saves it for important moments like when your mom holds you down and encourages the people in white to draw blood from both shoulders.
Soon enough Dad's home. I'm still grumpy, but I try to motivate. But he's watching me for ten minutes when I let go of the table and faceplant straight into the floor and I rip into dad like he's a DP walking around like ahdahdahdahdahdah through Christian Bale's set.
I've barely wiped the boogers out of my face when the deliveryman comes with the tacos and dad again looks away. I pull myself up on the stool to try and said tacos and the stool tips over and falls on my damn leg and I just give up. Please contact the webmaster and have this day deleted. I have flagged this day because it fucking offensive.
